This week I stumbled across a blog which you all have probably read before, called Single Dad Laughing. While it’s focused on finding and sharing the up-side of life and parenting, it also has a number of poignant, honest and moving articles. A lot of what I’ve been reading has sparked a series of ideas for posts, articles, thoughts and debates.
But the one thought that just had to be shared right now, right here, is being real.
I started this blog because I want to unravel the process of being truly happy. I believe true joy – deep, meaningful, lasting joy is an absolute possibility for anybody. I believe that joy and happiness are not the same thing. I believe that joy is not dependant on circumstances or events. It’s not about money or people or places or things. It’s not about what you do, where you do it or why.
I choose joy. I choose to find the good in situations, even when it’s hard. Even when it seems impossible. It IS there, and it can be found.
As I go, I learn. I grow. And then I share it here. Or at least, that’s the idea.
It struck me today that I’ve been sharing the lessons, but not the journey. In many cases, the lessons I’m outlining are for my own benefit, as much as anything. Sort of like an electronic diary. That’s good. We need records, and tracking progress is a good thing. The problem with this approach, though, is that it can come across as preachy.
I certainly don’t know it all. Far from it. The more I think I’ve figured out, the more there is to know. The world seems to be big and complicated. I’m grasping a thread of truth and unravelling it, following it to its final destination. The more I unravel, the further the journey takes me. It’s fascinating and enlightening at the same time. I feel like I’m staring into a tangled snarl, like the nest of my daughter’s hair in the morning before I take a brush to it. Behind me is a neatly wound ball of sense. The lessons are like little rubber bands holding it all together, but without a clearer picture of the journey, the silver strands of clarity holding it all together, perhaps they don’t make sense.
So I’ve decided to overcome my reticence and be more forthcoming. I’m not talking about indiscretion or immodesty. This won’t be overshare or TMI. But I feel that, for me to have value – both to myself and (hopefully) to any other person, I need to be a lot more real about what happens between where I am now and where I am when that moment of clarity emerges and I can write about it.
I hope you’ll join me for the ride. And let me know what you think (just be nice. You don’t have to agree, just let’s not be mean).
– By Vanessa Davies – daily discovering Joy on a Shoestring.