How the Words We Choose Can Shape Us

“It happened to me. When I was six. I was staying with a family friend, and he …”

Blah blah blah.

It happened to me.


How very disempowering. It takes away my power and gives it to – what? To fate? There is no liability attached to that. “It happened …” Thanks, fate.

It didn’t happen to me.

He did it to me.

I didn’t cause it. Or ask for it. Or deserve it.

And it does not define me.

I don’t know what happened to him – who did what – to break him so badly that, at age 13, he could do that to an innocent and defenceless six-year-old.

I forgive him.

I relieve him of the burden of my pain (but not its liability).

I relieve myself.

I am not that moment. It is not my fate. This is not my destiny.

He did something.

That is all.

Choose your words wisely - they have the power to shape you.

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